GARY 2.0

Finally, a marketable product. Just in time for the holidays. New Weave Genetics unveiled its latest version after the press died following the Beta flop. Pun intended.

GARY 2.0.

Although if you went back through the official documents you'd see it was actually GARY 1.9.9. Never completed recommended testing. When this information was eventually discovered, heads rolled. Again, pun intended.

On paper and in commercials, Gentleman Always Ready for You was a great idea. Genetically engineered and laboratory-raised. All the things a woman would want in a guy. Or custom modified for what a guy would want in a guy. There was also research done into a female model, but the brain chemistry was too complex. Kept screwing up but nobody could tell. When GARY Beta was released, there was only one made. He went on a rampage. Killed fourteen people. Seriously.

But New Weave went back to the drawing board. People forgot about the incident, huge cover up. Such short attention spans. Then suddenly GARY is released, version 2.0 everywhere but in the marketing, and eight thousand were sold worldwide. Within a year, each one of them had killed on average six people, including a dozen suicides. And get this, the guy that they based GARY on was killed by mistake.

Anyway. That was about a year ago. People are already starting to forget about it, and that's why I'm blogging about it now. Whatever the news feeds are saying, whatever Wikipedia says, it's not true. Six years ago, this happened. It was real. And if this new product - BETSY - is not stopped by government or by force, there will be more blood on the hands of New Weave Genetics. Pun intended. And literal.

Contact your State Supervisor today!

Release Date: June 13, 2015
Read more about BETSY here.