Webbing

Look, ahh, I know you're still reading this! You're wondering why there haven't been any updates! Have I completely stopped writing anythings?

No, no, and, no!

My site is almost ready to go live, I swear! And once then, that!

Interim

I've been testing applications and scripts lately. Decided to use third-party code instead of writing my own, otherwise I'll be reinventing the wheel for another few months. There are things that are beyond my capabilities and time constraints, and the sooner I accept that, the sooner I can push things forward. Gah, I want to go live with my vision soon, otherwise it will get blurred; and once live, there's no going back. I will have to become as hyper-prolific as my ambition. Writing, recording, drawing, creating. This life I'm in now is, at least career-wise, completely unfulfilling, and I know that I deserve better.

Oh, and I., thank you.

(Losing and Finding) The Way

A dream last night that I couldn't shake despite waking from it twice had me arriving from a flight to Vancouver and being met by my father. Such a surprise that he managed to navigate his way through public transportation to welcome me home. I was so happy and relieved to see him. I followed him up an escalator, on the Skytrain, on the bus; always behind him, always looking up at him. We went in circles, neither of us could navigate the city well enough to escape the loop. The city blurred every place I've lived; Peace River, Edmonton, and here, Vancouver. We never found our way.

Yesterday afternoon left me unable to fight feelings of insufficiency. My mind was running scared. It was nothing more than I couldn't. Everything.

Yesterday evening I could. Once again, I could, and she brought me there. I never want to go back. Or, for that matter, anywhere without her.

Impatience

Nowhere else in nature is such impatience found as it is in us. It never used to be this way, probably because we simply didn't know any better. Now technology has created a demand of instant satisfaction. At any given moment, we hardly have time; it is not on our side, we have turned it against ourselves.

Yesterday, I was on my motorcycle, unable to turn left because of a few stray pedestrians. There was no oncoming traffic, but I hardly felt like either running anyone over, so I waited. The twit behind me honked incessantly, and so I turned back to look at him, pointing out the people I didn't want to hit. As I turned away from him, he inched his bumper to my back tire and gave me a nudge. Imagine that, someone so put out by these few seconds of waiting, someone so self-important they couldn't even be bothered to change lanes and go around me.

We often focus on a few things of little importance and inflate it immeasurably in our mind. Listen, the world will wait.

My Back to the Drawing Board

My web site doubts have devoured me. Already. As I think about usefulness and practicality, I wonder who but my imaginary fans might visit it. I wanted a means to bridge my politics and creativity. Exposure. But the Internet is already full of exposure, and who can really harness that, anyway? And so it will come along now, a new vision. Something far simpler. And with that, new deadlines, new delays.

At least in part.

Of Spirits Good and Evil

This morning was wondering why the sun was up earlier than it had been in the past weeks. Had we slept in? Was I late for work? No, in the busyness of the day before and the shenanigans that night, we'd forgotten to fall behind. The unexpected extra hour was vastly relaxing.

Our home is lined with boxes of our things, some packed carefully and some rushed. Some in the room they belong, others not. It is a beautiful place already, but with us in it, it becomes something more. Something complete. And when everything is in its proper place, it will only be greater. It did not rain on us yesterday as was predicted. I suppose it couldn't have. Not while the universe is at peace.

To celebrate Hallowe'en, I. and I went for a brief chilled stroll around our new neighbourhood. There were houses decorated, pumpkins carved, and a cardboard robot dragging aluminum cans. As I. said, it is the days like this that bring community together. People walk the night streets in good spirits, enjoying the company of the strangers that surround us. This is how life should be; joyful and safe. I think it's the other days when we masquerade otherwise.

Last year, I wrote a series of brief fictions about vampires, zombies, monsters, werewolves, and mummies. Don't be scared, they can't possibly bite you.